Friday, July 31, 2009

Gut Check/Hot Stove Friday

Wow, there is so much to cover today, I'm afraid I'll miss something. Let's do an abbreviated version of Gut Check Friday, then fantasy hot stove, then the real deal hot stove.

Baby Gorillas-9
The Rockpile-1

Domination for a second week. I'm now afraid I shouldn't have tweaked my team this week.

Tallcorn Cobras-7

If you wanna be in the playoffs, 3K, you've got a funny way of showing it.

Hoosier Heat-7
CO Yankees-1

Big week for Hackman, and he needs it to keep up with a cruising T-Dub.

The SwinGERS-6
Lawndale Longhorns-3

This should be interesting, a SwinGER win could catapult him to 3rd place in PG East.

Jimmy's Daddy-5
Clark & Addison-4

A classic street brawl for first place. Big time playoff implications here.

Client #9-3

Now is not the time to be losing to a #10 seed, Baby Bisho.

The hot stove was a little dull yesterday in the big leagues, but it was piping hot here in PG Sportsworld. And New Linc was front and center, knocking off two deals in an attempt to push him into the playoff winners bracket. Earlier yesterday, Linc sent Jair Jurrjens to Hoosier Heat for outfielder Matt Holliday. Jurrjens currently has a two year deal in place and Holliday will walk after this season. A strong message was sent that New Linc is going for the gusto THIS SEASON and will worry about the fallout after the season ends. And he wasn't done just yet. Later in the day, the Longhorns sent Kevin Gregg and Alex Rio to the Tallcorn Cobras for Derek Jeter and George Sherill. To me, this is a VERY shrewd move by T-Dub and the reason why you must be vigilant during trade deadlines. T-Dub sensed that Sherrill may be shipped to Los Angeles (and realized that he was become a back-up to closer Jonathan Broxton, thus giving him almost zero fantasy value), and he reacted in a timely manner. In Sherril's sted, the Cobra's acquire Kevin Gregg, who have 4 saves in the last 12 days. Well played, sir.

As far as today's MLB hot stove, what are you guys hearing out there? Quick note, if you fools had a Twitter account, you would get up to the second hot stove updates from baseball writers all around the country. Give it a shot, The Ger and I love it. And if you create an account, you can download an app right to your iPhone or Blackberry.

I'll leave you with this WHOPPER I heard about.....Heath Bell AND Adrian Gonzalez to the Florida Marlins for pitching prospect Andrew Miller, AA outfielder Mike Stanton and AAA outfielder Cameron Maybin.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

Hot Stove Thread

We may as well have some dialouge going today as we approach the trading deadline. What is everybody hearing? If you're in the car, on the internet, or watching MLB TV and see or hear something interesting, go ahead and post it in the comments. And no, I don't want to hear, "I was driving on the freeway and I saw two cows fucking along the side of the road". Interesting? Sure. Relavant? Absolutely not. Here's a few I saw this morning.

A sure sign the Jays are desperate, got absolutely worked over with that Cliff Lee trade, and are starting to panic? They're trying to get the Yankees and the Red Sox into a bidding war for Halladay. Nice job, J.P. You're a hell of a GM. That was pure comedy. Here's the Blue Jays-we want every prospect in your system for Halladay. Here's the Phillies-You're crazy. Here's the Blue Jays-Then you can kiss Halladay goodbye. Here's the Phillies-Ok, we'll sign Cliff Lee. Here's the Blue Jays-Uh....wait.....what?

This is great....ESPN's Peter Gammons told us Wednesday that Ricciardi is not optimistic that Halladay will be traded. "We'd have to be wowed," says Ricciardi. "And we haven't been wowed." You haven't been wowed because you're too busy getting WORKED, son!!!!!!

To me, if Halladay doesn't go to LA, he ain't going anywhere. You've gotta believe LA wants to respond to Philly (who is now clearly the best team in the NL). But at what price? Kershaw? Billingsly? My adopted National League team could make a move, but personally I think they're good as is. And I don't care what anyone says, if push comes to shove, throw Mattingly out there. He can still play!!!

So I guess Victor Martinez is next? How does that feel, Jason Varitek? Thanks for your years of service, there's a nice warm spot at the end of the bench there for ya! Shit, you can even head over to the Cask And Flagon for a beer, we don't mind. Take Johnny Pesky with ya, he'll keep ya company.

I would be absolutely shocked if the Padres trade Adrian Gonzalez (and it would be VERY interesting if he went to the Red Sox). I mean, Heath Bell I can see, but Gonzalez has to be the cornerstone on which they rebuild their team.

Love this, Cubs are in search of a lefty bat who can play right. My advice? Go out to Hill Valley, to a Doctor Emmitt Brown. Use his DeLorean to travel back in time to January of 2009 and fuckin sign Bobby Abreu. Morons.

Every trading deadline, I lob a threat at the New York Yankees as a result of a rumor that I have heard, and it goes something like this, "I swear to fuckin God, if they trade for [INSERT NAME HERE], I'm finished with them". The most memorable being the 2000 season when the Yankees were on the cusp of trading for Sammy Sosa (instead they went with David Justice, thank GOD). I'm gonna do it slightly different this season. Here we go....

I swear to God, if the fuckin Yankees trade away Phil Hughes, Joba Chamberlain, Austin Jackson, or Jesus Montero, I'm finished with them".

Wednesday, July 29, 2009


Just a reminder that our trade deadline is midnight on August 20th.

Wednesday Check-In

Wow, pretty eventful Tuesday that saw a couple of blockbusters and a ton of trade talk. Looks like everyone is either preparing for the playoffs and/or next season. Which brings me to the playoffs. Had to go back and sift through the e-mails between Wade and I and this is what we envisioned for the playoffs (apologies for not being clearer in our rules).

For the winners bracket....

The division winners of PG East and PG West will be seeded #1 and #2.

2nd place in each division will be seeded #3 and #4.

Next best records not in the top 4 will be seeded #5 and #6.

The losers bracket seeds will be based on record. So hypothetically, if the season ended today this is what the seeding would look like.....

#1-Tallcorn Cobras
#2-Jimmy's Daddy
#3-Hoosier Heat
#4-Clark & Addison
#5-Client #9
#6-The Rockpile/Lawndale Longhorns

#7-The Rockpile/Lawndale Longhorns
#8-The Cornholers
#9-The SwinGERS
#11-Baby Gorillas
#12-CO Yankees

In the event that there's a tie (like the Rockpile/Lawndale Longhorns, we'll just look at the head to head record between the two teams).


Tuesday, July 28, 2009


The Baby Gorillas obtain Hanley Ramirez, Joba Chamberlain, Curtis Granderson, and Juan Rivera from Jimmy's Daddy for Ryan Braun, Jayson Werth, and Joakim Soria.


The Heat and Daddy's rocked the fantasy baseball world this morning after an intense 24 hour negotiation marathon that sent Alex Rodriguez and Barry Zito to the Heat in exchange for C.C. Sabathia and Fernando Rodney.

The Daddy's GM Hef was searching far and wide for a top tier starter as well as filling a void in the closer's role. Mission accomplished, some might say. But it certainly came at a price with the departing Rodriguez. Heat GM Mr. Hackman will presumably sit Mark DeRosa in place of Rodriguez, adding to his arsenal of power.

Observing GM T-Dub was aghast at the news, saying, "Wow, I'm a little bit in shock, there is no question the Heat just got a little more scary with their bats and Daddy equally with the pitching...I feel like the pack of dogs is getting closer".

"After my embarassing loss last week to PG, the Daddy's felt the need to shake things up", opined Hef, "Hoosiers came to the table with fair offers that would help both teams down the stretch so it only made sense to make the move".

The move will surely invite criticism from opposing GM's, as it does anytime a top 5 fantasy players is traded away. However, Hef points out that Hank Blalock has put up comparable numbers to A-Rod this season, so his utility role may not lose production.

Linc’s Rumblings, Whispers, & Rumors

Ok, is it really necessary for ESPN to have a count down ticker to the trade deadline? Now I'll be the first to admit that I love me some Buster Gammons with a side of Timmy Kurtchen but we aren't talking about the dooms day clock people! Is the Boo-ya network so devoid of drama that they must manufacture some? Or is this simply a cheap ploy to distract us from the Erin Andrews video that every OTHER cable network has been reporting. Man, I would love to see some of the internal employee memos floating around Bristol instructing staff not to search for the video, view the video, speak of the video, or use any of the following words in public: shaved, bush, size, thirty-four, or c-cup.

Cliff Lee (SP) – With the Jays setting the price for Halladay so high several teams have turned their attention toward northeast Ohio. Reportedly “out” of the Halladay sweepstakes, Philadelphia resumed talked with the tribe. Milwaukee, Boston, and Tampa Bay are also said to still be in touch but the front runner appears to be the Dodgers who are rumored to be offering Billingsley or Kershaw and James Looney in return for Lee and Victor Martinez.

Adam Dunn (OF/1B/DH) – Prior to being traded to the Cardinals, Detroit thought it had put together a pretty competitive offer for Matt Holiday. Still in search for a big bat to spark their offense Dunn becomes an obvious candidate to protect Cabrera in the lineup. Another rumor which surfaced a week back was a “change of scenery” trade where the woeful Magglio Ordonez would go to the north side in return of the equally woeful Milton Bradley. Both the Cubs and Tigers immediately denied ever discussing such a deal.

George Sherrill (RP) – Every contending team with a weak bullpen has been rumored to have interest in Sherrill. The Marlins, Cubs, Rays, and Angels all are said to have made offers but no deal has materialized because Baltimore wants a closer in return. Although Baltimore and Chicago have partnered up before (Hill, Patterson) the Cubs won’t trade Marmol. Florida and the Rays have no immediate talent in their bullpens or they would have used them by now which leaves the Angels as the lone contender with the players and payroll to add Sherrill by the deadline.

Bronson Arroyo (SP) – Are you a team in need of a starting pitcher but don’t want to trade away any of your top young talent? Have piles of cash just laying around and player salaries aren’t an issue? Has your franchise not made the playoffs for several years despite having crazy amounts of talent? Well, do I have the guy for you! Brian meet Bronson, Bronson say hello to Mr. Cashman.

Matt Capps (RP) – For the past three weeks my mentor and hero Lord Olney has discussed Freddie Sanchez traded to either San Francisco or Minnesota. Should Pittsburgh and Minnesota find common ground look for Capps to also be included in this deal in return for Minnesota restocking the Pirate farm system. The Twins bullpen is thin and the Pirates could replace Capps with Grabow.

Roy Halladay (SP) – I’ll close the final edition of Linc’s Rumblings, Whispers, & Rumors with the latest Halladay rumor – or lack of one if you trust J.P. Ricciardi. Apparently the Jays asking price from the Phillies was too rich and the Phillies have turned their attention to Seattle in hopes of acquiring Bedard or Washburn. If Philadelphia is indeed out of the sweepstakes the Jays appear to be without a dance partner who has the young talent necessary to get the deal done. Cue Tampa Bay! If the Rays want to make a move that will significantly boost their chances to catch Boston and New York Halladay is their only real option. The Rays have the youth, farm system, and talent to land Halladay. According to the St. Petersburg media the Rays built a package for Halladay around Scott Kazmir just to gauge the Jays interest. That first deal was rejected but the paper quoted one Rays official as saying the talks are “major, major stuff”. We will see if a deal gets done before the deadline – obviously the PRICE will have to be right!

Wednesday, July 22, 2009

Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Fenway Knucklh-ED

Ok, as you already know, we have a situation here. Fenway Ed's roster is ILLEGAL due to having too many reserve pitchers. This would give Tallcorn Cobras an automatic 10-0 win. We have heard complaints on the comment boards(amazing when complaining GM's don't mind a tweak if it's helping out their own cause), and I have talked to T-Dub, who suggested we give Fenway Ed a little help.

I talked to Fenway Ed, and he said that he executed a trade with The SwinGERS yesterday, not knowing it would go into effect immediately (as it did). To me, this is an extenuating circumstance and because of that, I am going move Andrew Bailey from reserve to active (thus, making Fenway Ed's team legal again).

Right now, as a result of the trade, his 3rd base spot is vacant as a result of that same trade. I am inclined to leave it vacant (the intent is and should be to get Year2000! to legal status so he doesn't incur a 10-0 loss). His team will be legal even if third base is vacant. The issue was too many reserve players that made it illegal.

What does everyone think?

Monday, July 20, 2009


I'm not going to bore you with a long winded recap of a all-star shortened week (although I was pleased to see the Daddy's take it on the chin). We'll go back to our regular scheduled recap Monday next week, when we have a sufficient amount of stats to analyze, breakdown, and make fun of.

I'm happy to re-introduce a league favorite, T-Dubs power rankings. Now that we're halfway through the season, how appropo to take a snapshot of the league (and who better to do it than the Almighty T-Dub). So here we go, take it away, Michael Schofield....

Now that I’ve stopped shaking from the debauchery (special thanks to Hackman and #9) coupled with the unbelievable high of one of the greatest sets of sporting events I’ve ever been able to attend, I sit here prepared to offer a mix of All-Star break power rankings broken into levels ranked by the weekend itself.


There’s no real way to describe the meaningless commitment one makes to a charity 5k fun run to kick off All-Star festivities on a Sunday morning – in fact, #9 and I worked our lungs so hard (a mixture of “lung darts” and fantasy talk) Sat night that I gave it nary a thought. Couple that with our already late return from the heaven that is East Saint Louis … topped off by leaving the Red Bull Party at Pointe 400 at approximately 4:30 a.m… you get the picture. No chance either of us were wasting our time with that stupid cardio-crap … get to the point you say? It’s POINTLESS, why do these teams equally waste their time?

Baby Gorillas, CO Yanks: Injuries … injuries … injuries. It is no mistake that these teams have had no luck this year. The dints and dings are sometimes insurmountable, just look at the guts of these rosters on Day 1. I know my time will come to experience this torture, so do all of you readers, but injuries are to fantasy baseball what Hendo’s punch to the face of Bisping’s jaw was Saturday night … deadly.


Sure … it sounds fun. Who wouldn’t want to watch Bob Knight and the like waddle around like ducks following torrential downpour that wouldn’t end. Uh … #9 for one … he didn’t make it that far … oh, Hackman and yours truly were equally engaged, making it all of 2 very painful innings before again deferring to a 2nd night on the East side after a stint on the grill. Look, get some bigger names, have some chicks show some cleavage (no Hackman, Shawn Johnson is in no way “hot”), and spike the ratings … same for this team, it just needs a spark.

Year 2000!, : Year 2000! Could easily fit in the black and blue category, but hey, you’re in striking distance. Get those d-cups out there, or your players in this case, and put on a show – its what the crowd wants! The only event I was really disappointed in. The fact is Fenway Ed, you are in striking distance if your players will use their “assets”.


The future is bright (maybe even this year?), even if there is a rain delay which forces fans to drink large quantities of really expensive booze in a concourse for 4 hours standing in a circle dissecting every possible 3-way deal our fantasy rosters could stand, drowning out your moment of today.

Lawndale Longhorns, The SwinGERS: Its been an uphill climb … and that speaks to the draft approach of these two, partly. Youth is present and sparks are there, and it doesn’t hurt as the wins are starting to come today. Look … you’re still on Sunday and two days from the big show that everyone wants to watch (largely because you’re in PG East), but you have a chance. The crowd doesn’t care, but you’re close enough to smell the big show.


This group is pretty fun to watch. Was it a bit of a letdown knowing how good it was last year with Hamilton … sure. But it was an awful bright stage that few sporting events can claim. These guys are good enough to put on a show, so you just gotta go and you gotta watch and you probably take it pretty serious. Take these teams serious. What a great lead into the All-Star game Monday night turned out to be.

Clark & Addison, Cornholers, Client #9: C&A … I apologize for everything I said about old-man Wakefield. 10.5 out of first and sniffin’ with a big win here or there. Cornholers … heck, not many have been on a better run, its that simple, but the hole you dug was deep. Client #9 is no joke, but approx 25 games out is like being Pujols with 5 HR’s and chasing multiple guys with 11+, its not very likely that dog’s gonna hunt.


The best of the best, a truly memorable experience. I did think it would be good, but forget about it. Let me just say that from the glorious opening ceremony … honestly one of the coolest moments I’ve ever witnessed ... to the emotional game where the players really did care and the play showed it, just an unreal experience. Somehow #9 decided it was ok to jet Tuesday before the game (!!??!!) … but it was a great night, great atmosphere, and just the real deal.

Jimmy’s Daddy, Hoosier Heat: Fantasy wise, these two teams are just flat out good just like the all-star game was in my eyes. The Daddy’s are not weak anywhere, save having a third closer (PG did not pay me to say that). And Hackman? He is putting a great chase on, and he’s no doubt 1a in this field of teams. I’m saying it now – watch out for Santana and his new mouthpiece … he was nails last night, call me crazy, but mark my words.


This team … and this broad, doubling as Pepper Lounge bartender by night and French maid for the Hardee’s French Dip whatever it is burger (former Rams cheerleader) by day … are in a league of her ..errrr … I mean their own. See starting video above (short blonde hair chick, good God) … I know one of you might even remember her.

TallCorn Cobras – Just like this chic, the Cobras stand alone. Enough said.

Friday, July 17, 2009

Gut Check Friday

Who are those two dudes, you ask? Why, it's Mr. Hackman on your left, and the Almighty T-Dub on your right, enjoying the All-Star Game festivities. Still no recap from anyone, and I've gotta be honest, I'm a little disappointed. We've gotta start organizing an annual PG Sportsworld convention/weekend getaway. Who's with me?

Since this is a shortened week, let me sum it up for you guys right now (for all teams)-

This contest is wide open, it's anyone's ballgame, this one will go down to the wire, it's a toss-up, could be a photo-finish, etc, etc, etc.

This week has to be the scariest week for a lot of teams (especially the ones in first place). One bad day, and your week is absolutely OVER. You could conceivably get skunked as a result of 3 days of poor play. On the other end, you could be the one doing the skunking. Here's to hoping my team is a skunker, not a skunkee.

Anyone hearing any juicy trade rumors (rumors that cannot be accessed through Speaking of mlbtraderumors, he's reporting that the Nats are looking to shop Willie Harris. Ask 3K to tell you about how we procured Willie Harris' second career home run (otherwise knows as "The Willie Ball").

B.J. Ryan to the Cubs. How does that situation shake out? BTW, was listening to the Score this week, some broad called up and said that she is neighbors with Carlos Marmol and the reason for his shitty performance is because he parties 24/7. How funny is that?

Line(s) of the day comes from the Trib's Rick Morrissey-"having someone in the most powerful position on earth who doesn't know a fly ball from a football....He throws like a....wait, I'm not going to say it. It's not worth the protests by the US women's national softball team.....let's just say he throws like someone who hardley has played sports. If I'm North Korea, I attack right now".

And this little nugget is the closest thing to absolute truth that I have ever heard-"Throwing a baseball is the great revealer:It exposes whether you're athletic. There are no excuses....if you're an athlete, it almost always comes out in your throwing form".

Speaking of absolute truth, how about the Sun Times Joe Cowley, who penned this beaut...-"I've always pulled for the bad guy. I wanted Tona Montana to live at the end of Scarface, I thought Sonny should have remained alive to run the Corleone family, and I still recognize Clubber Lang as the true heavyweight champion of the world from the Rocky movies and I know deep in my heart that the All-Valley Karate Tournament was fixed because there is no way Daniel LaRusso would have gotten past Dutch, let alone Johnny Lawrence".

And speaking of Daniel LaRusso, I just want to address something Yankee Mike said on yesterday's comments re: hypothetical trade situations for teams that would land Roy Halladay. Yankee Mike suggested Halladay for Austin Jackson, Jesus Montero, and Joba Chamberlain. I know it's hypothetical and in good fun, but someone in your immediate vicinity should slap you in the face.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Linc's Rumblings, Whispers, and Rumors

Much like the State of Illinois legislative budgeting process it seems that the closer a group, any group, of people involved in a negotiation approach a deadline the harder it is to discern the truth from the bullshit. As such, there are some wild rumors swirling in MLB and this is your weekly edition of what Linc has learned……

Roy Halladay (SP) – The Jays are shopping Halladay and expect any team willing to talk turkey to overwhelm them with an offer. Only a handful of teams have the payroll flexibility and personnel to play ball. Although the Phillies appear to be a strong contender, the Angels are rumored to be the front runner offering both minor league prospects and major league talent, specifically Wood and Kendrick, in return.

Dan Uggla (2B) – Just as the many Marlins players before him, Uggla has priced himself out of south Florida. Prior to the All-Star Break the Giants were rumored to have interest but that trail has gone cold. If the Marlins are successful in moving Uggla prior to the deadline it now looks as though Cardinal nation will be their only hope.

Javier Vazquez (SP) – If you haven’t heard by now that the Brewers are in desperate need of pitching you’ve been living under a rock. Vazquez joins such names as Bedard, Washburn, Davis, Garland, and Niemann as possible new members of the Brewers rotation. I haven’t heard Vazquez’s name associated with any other team so it may be premature to say the Braves have put Vazquez on the market. Instead the Braves may be seeing if Milwaukee would give up a top prospect like Gamel in order to keep Braun happy.

Scott Rolen (3B) – The Reds have offered the youth and potential of Edwin Encarnocion for the experience and salary of Scott Rolen. The Reds are looking to add some pop to their order, even more so now that Jay Bruce has snapped his wrist. Boston is also said to be interested in Rolen at the deadline should Lowell be ineffective after being activated from the DL later this week.

Freddie Sanchez (2B) – Sanchez is a more consistent and less expensive option to Uggla. Although Sanchez doesn’t provide the power the Giants are looking for he would provide batting average and come at a much cheaper price. SF was ready to send Jonathan O. Sanchez to Pittsburgh for Freddie Sanchez prior to the SF Sanchez’s no hitter. The only reason this deal isn’t done is SF is waiting to see if interest will spike in their Sanchez.

Alex Rios (OF) – In a move that could be a precursor to what they are wanting in return for Halladay, the Jays are rumored to have a deal in place with the Pirates to send Alex Rios to Pittsburgh in exchange for Paul Maholm.

Matt Holiday (OF) – Despite Holiday recently being over shadowed by Halladay, there is still a steady stream of teams rumored to be interested. The Mets seem to still be in the mix as do the Giants but three new teams have joined the picture. The Reds have inquired but don’t look to be much of a talent match with the A’s needs. The Braves have offered Yunel Escobar and prospects for Halladay and Caberra. The A’s have offered the Cardinals Halladay and Caberra seeking Ludwick or Rasmus and prospects in return.

Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Odds and Ends

Hat tip to Yankee Mike for the suggestion, take a look at this video, absolutely hysterical.

Looking forward to hearing some stories from Mr. Hackman, T-Dub, and Baby Bisho about All-Star weekend/week. Should be fun for all. Speaking of the All-Star festivities, a few observations...

BTW, didn't know Fenway Ed was at the All-Star game.

Seriously, someone needs to sign Nelly to some sort of pro contract. That guy is a legitimate athlete. He dominates during the NBA All-Star weekend, the NFL's Super Bowl festivities, and now Major League Baseball. The original St. Lunatic missed his calling, I think. If he laces up the ice skates next year, I'm gonna lose it.

And who knew Brian Littrel from the Backstreet Boys had any talent. You could tell he clearly has played baseball before (and played it well). All this time I thought the guys in that group were catchers if you know what I mean....who knew?

If you aren't coordinated or don't know how to play baseball/softball, do yourself a favor, don't even try it. It just makes you look even worse than you already do. I always loved a few years back when comedian Kevin James played, and was so serious, that he took out a third baseman in a sliding attempt.

I totally forgot how awesome Stan Musial was. 26 time all-star, are you kidding? That was a great moment, reminded me of when they carted out Teddy Ballgame at Fenway.

And how rad was Lou Brock's hair? Looks like that noggin hasn't been touched since 1977. That ain't nuttin but ultraperm.

When Tim Lincecum hit Jeter, I was praying that Roy Halladay was gonna put it in someone's ear. Seriously, how great would that be if there was a bench clearing brawl in an all-star game?

Question of the day, has anyone ever been selected as an all-star and been traded between the final game of the first half and the first pitch of the All Star game? This isn't an AFLAC trivia type question, I seriously don't know the answer.

Ok, Barack Obama.....a few things here. First, his conversation with Derek Jeter was CLASSIC. First, he rolls up on Jeter and starts talking like Ol Dirty Bastard from the Wu Tang Clan. The Ger correctly pointed out that Obama looked more excited to meet Jeter than Jeter was to meet Obama. Jeter's got that, "I'm not impressed because I've conquered more women and baseball accolades than anyone in this room" swagger about him.

Liked that Barry wore jeans and sneakers. He's just your average, Harvard-educated Joe.

Second, Obama's throw. If I were to grade it, I'd give it a C-. Why so high, you ask? Well, because he didn't bounce it and he threw from the mound (oh yeah, he's lefty as well). Outside of that, dude, ya throw like a girl!! Love Bush or hate him, that dude could hum it in there. He might of fucked up the country, but by God he could throw a stike from 60 feet, 6 inches (and with gusto). If I were Obama, I would have brought my glove to Russia, the Vatican, and Ghana, and spent every free moment getting my arm ready. Dude, don't let foreign policy get in the way of what's really important....hittin fuckin 85 on the jugs gun, baby!!! This is America, you're the leader of America, throw it like you've got a set.

The Sox jacket. Why are so many people making such an issue about this? OH NO, HE WORE A SOX JACKET....THAT'S JUST ONE TEAM....WHY DIDN'T HE HAVE A MLB JACKET ON. THAT'S NOT POLITICALLY CORRECT. Seriously, I want to punch people who are saying that today. I have more respect for Obama for sticking to his guns and his team. Love when he pointed out in the booth that some Sox fans "absolutely hate the Cubs". That must have been a special shout out to 3K.

Line of the night goes to President Barry Obama while in the broadcast booth. Joe Buck was talking about the National League and said something to the effect of, "well, there's no bailout there". And Obama goes, "well, we're all out of money". Great humor there.

Ok guys, post those comments. I'm sure I missed a truck load of moments.

Monday, July 13, 2009


While Albert Pujols is dropping bombs in St. Louis, Rocky and Yankee Mike are doing the same halfway across the country.

The CO Yankees have sent OF Carlos Lee and SS Stephen Drew to The Rockpile for P Dallas Braden and Denard Span.

As an owner who was in late night negotiations with Yankee Mike this weekend, I will forgo my analysis of the trade, so it's up to you guys to dissect this transaction and give your winners/losers report. The last thing I need is Yankee Mike crying sour grapes and charges of bias being thrown my way.

Rocky Mike will be receiving slugger Lee, who is currently hitting .308 with 13 homers and 49 runs batted in. Exiting Pepper Park in Denver, Rockpile GM declared, "We needed some power and consistency in the lineup, which Carlos Lee provides". In addition, he will receive a replacement to Christian Guzman (who was hitting .308 in his own right, but lacking power and run production). "I commend Yankee Mike for moving in a quick and professional manner", stated Rockpile GM Rocky Mike, "both GM's worked quickly". Stephen Drew has enjoyed some success of late, hitting .421 last week, and .317 with 2 bombs and 10 runs scored in the last 3 weeks). "I think Drew has a lot of upside", quipped Rocky Mike, "I took 2 guys on my bench and traded them for 2 players who will start right away". The Rockpile was able to unload Denard Span and improve his stable of outfielders with the acquisition of El Caballo. Currently Stephen Drew is signed to a 2 year deal and Carlos Lee's contract will be up at the end of the season.

The CO Yankees were looking for a starting pitcher, and Dallas Braden will step into that role. Braden is currently 7-7 with the unimpressive Oakland A's (in his last 6 starts, Braden is 0-2 with an very strong 2.58 ERA and 1.07 WHIP). His 3.12 ERA and 1.26 WHIP has to be what attracted Yankee Mike to this deal. Yankee Mike, interviewed while driving away from Colorado Legends Field, said, "We're stoked to get Braden, another great pitcher from Oaktown". Span looks to be a throw-in, and one must ask if there will be an outfielder controversey with Johnny Damon waiting in the wings. Could Span be a secret weapon? "I need runs and stolen bases..I had a surplus of home runs and runs batted in...Span fills that void", replied Yankee Mike, "we appreciate Carlos Lee's for Drew, we didn't like his attitude". With both players only signed through the end of the season, Yankee Mike took a bold step and publicly declared a "win at all costs" approach. Sitting solidly in last place of PG West, the CO Yankees were looking to make a bold move and try and emerge from Chapter 7-11 (PG speak for win-bankruptcy). Repeated calls to Yankee Mike for comment were not returned.

Your call guys, what do you think?

Monday Recap

TWO OUTS!!! It seems we had a mini-PG convention this weekend in St. Louis, home of this years All Star game. That's right, Baby Bisho, T-Dub, and Mr. Hackman united for a night of boozing and bashing. No word yet on casualties, but I'm guessing it got pretty ugly. So if you're out there today, pray tell. Special thanks to Baby Bisho for offering a ticket to the Futures Game as well as tonights Home Run Derby. I'm pissed I couldn't get down there. Last time I had a offer like this, Yankee Mike was ordering me to hop on a train from Boston to New York for the Yankees-Mets World Series. I sat that one out and have regretted it ever since.

Is everyone tuning in to the derby tonight? I'm not as much of a fan of the derby as I am the goings-on during the derby. Players milling around, taking snapshots and video of everyone. I like the interviews, the behind the scences stuff. It's always fun to get an inside look at the action.

Baby Gorillas-5
Lawndale Longhorns-5

Wow, tying the Gorilla's. A dubious achivement. I might be a pussy, Linc(as mentioned in Friday's comments). But you're team is playing like they have one.

Jimmy's Daddy-7
The Rockpile-2

Hef pulled the old switcheroo and sent Rocky Mike to the depths of PG East (don't worry, Rocky Mike, it's gonna take a lot to hit rock bottom. The Daddy's have a swagger, as referenced by his mouthy ways on the blog lately. His pretty close to being dubbed a complete team. Except for the saves, of course.

Year 2000!-4

Calls to 3K went unanswered this weekend, could he be giving PG a taste of his own medicine? Or was he so focused on beating Fenway Ed? Year 2000! made a late push, but to no avail. .500 in PG West is a tough place to be. That's 2nd in PG East. Just sayin.

Hoosier Heat-7
Client #9-2

Hackman, I hope you gave Baby Bisho all kinds of shit over beers this weekend in The Lou. Bisho has a strange sense of priorities, in that he'll get fired up from a little fantasy baseball ribbing or Ritz-Carlton softball games, stuff like that. Hope you didn't go easy on him.

Tallcorn Cobras-10
CO Yankees-0

PG wanted a skunk and a skunk is what PG got!!!!!!!! See Yankee Mike, that's karma from berating me on the blog last week (and those half-assed trade offers you threw my way Friday night). The quality of your trade negotiations is directly proportional to the love you receive from the fantasy Gods week in and week out. It's fantasy 101, Yankee Mike, it's not rocket science.

Clark & Addison-6
The SwinGERS-4

I wanted a skunk here but The Ger just wasn't having it. A very nice push for the SwinGERS, but at the end of the day, the more successful McCreery carried the day. Hey Ger, any reason why you played Skip Schumacher over Ryan "4 Bombs and 15 RBI" Ludwick?

Friday, July 10, 2009

Gut Check Friday

I'm sorry, this has nothing to do with baseball, but I had to post it. Absolutely priceless. Love the look on Sarkozy's face. It's a look of admiration, a look of pride. That look screams, "he's growing up so fast, and he's just like me". Anytime a dude gets caught leering at a girls ass (that isn't his wife's), it's a funny moment. Ok, here we go-

Lawndale Longhorns-5
Baby Gorillas-5

1 home run....are you kidding me? I'll tell you what, Ryan Braun, Shane Victorino, and Kevin Youklis can't get here fast enough. I'm wondering if New Linc's 7.57 ERA will send him back to the negotiating table with Clark & Addison? I can see Railsplitter just dangling Liriano over New Linc's head. Come it get it, New Linc. Looks like you're ailing and your brother has the sweet elixir that can make everything ok. Plus, I haven't heard either of you call each other a pussy yet (a staple for brothers, or so I'm told).

The Rockpile-7
Jimmy's Daddy-2

The Rockpile are making a statement this week and the statement is this-don't count us out. Only 11 games out of first place, a 7-2 win would catapult them into instant contention. Hef's gotta be hating the 0 saves his team has acquired this week. Imagine what it would be like to have 2 solid closers in your stable (can you tell there were trade talks this week?).

The Cornholers-7
Year 2000!-2

3K running on all cylinders this week, and he has made a steady (and very impressive) climb in PG West. Defeating natural adversary (I've hung out with
them, believe me, they're like oil and water) will be a boon to The Cornholers. It's gonna be very hard for Fenway Ed to climb out of this cellar, look for Year 2000! to sink deeper into the abyss (we're talkin Gorilla territory).

Hoosier Heat-6
Client #9-3

It looks like Hackman is running the table on the mound, and the only stat Baby Bisho has locked up is stolen bases. The Fighting Spitzers need to scrape and claw to make this thing close (and they're gonna have to do it at the plate). If they stall tonight and into tomorrow, it's gonna be a rout for Clean Gene.

Tallcorn Cobras-6
CO Yankees-2

In the words of Hawk Harrelson...this ballgame is OVA!!!!!!!!!! Sorry Yankee Mike, but it's true. The pitching stats are too insumountable (especially with Joe Maurer and Jason Bay RAKING).

Clark & Addison-7
The SwinGERS-3

I can see Railsplitter walking into the Alley Bi Saloon, seeing New Linc huddled in a booth with his braintrust (who are panicking at the thought of losing to the Baby Gorillas this week). As Railsplitter lets out an almost inaudible chuckle, he bellys up to the bar, orders a shot, glancing over New Linc's way, and raises the shot glass. As he let's the whiskey go to work, he is comfortable in the knowledge that he's in the hunt for PG East, and New Linc needs him more than he needs New Linc. I digress, look for a potential skunk here.

Thursday, July 9, 2009

Rumors Abound

Hi, this is Slappy White, and THIS is a PG Sportsworld update-

The city of Lincoln, Illinois is a hornet's nest of activity, as rumors are circulating that a deal between The Brothers McCreery may be imminent.

An inside source has told PG Sportsworld that what started out as back and forth phone calls has turned into serious, serious discussions.

"I saw them leaving the Alley Bi saloon late last night. Both were carrying what appeared to be player bios and as they exited, they turned to eachother, nodded and shook hands", said an unnamed source.

We'll keep you updated as more information comes in.

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

Linc's Rumblings, Whispers, and Rumors

With 24 days remaining before the MLB trade deadline the NL and AL pennant races and the wild card picture are starting to take shape. While there is still a lot of baseball left to be played the following is what Linc has learned……

San Diego
KansasCity Houston

Chicago White Sox
Chicago Cubs

New York Yankees
New York Mets
Tampa Bay
San Francisco
LA Dodgers
LA Angels
St. Louis

Adam LaRoche (1B) – The Pirates are in familiar waters (hey hey!) this time of year and are looking to trade off the lesser of the two LaRoche brothers. The Mets are in need of a first baseman (see below) but the Giants appear to be the most likely destination. Expect a LaRoche to SF for Jonathan Sanchez (or less) before the deadline.

Aubrey Huff (1B) – The Mets appear to have zeroed in on Huff now that DeRosa has been dealt to STL. Huff can play 1B, spell Wright at 3B, and move to the OF should Delgado return ahead of schedule.

Jason Marquis (SP) – Colorado wants to take advantage of Marquis’s 11 wins and the Phillies are said to be interested. There is a glitch, however, in that the Philadelphia media is reporting the Phillies may consider signing Pedro Martinez instead. This could be nothing more than a move to get Colorado to lower their asking price.

Scott Linbrink (RP) – Those of you who speak Ozzie know that Guillen thinks his team is over performing trash. Kenny Williams seems to have a different opinion so it is unclear if the Chi Sox will be buyers or sellers. Should they become sellers, Linbrink appears to have value with Texas (whom the Sox have a comfort level in doing business), the Giants, and the Devil Rays.

Jermaine Dye (OF) – Dye to the Angels is a rumor I’ve read in multiple sources – with some reporting Figgins headed to the south side. Cincinnati is also said to be scouting Dye as they are looking for a power hitting OF to team with Bruce and Tavarez.

Garrett Atkins (INF) – This would be part deux of the Halos big plan. Should the Angels give up Figgins to obtain Dye they could trade for Atkins to fill the void at 3B. Atkins is odd man out in Denver but thus far Colorado’s asking price has been too high.

Victor Martinez (C/1B) – No doubt Martinez is going to be calling a new team home after the All-Star Break. The only real question is where? The Giants are set behind the plate in both the short term (Molina) and long term (Posey) so V-Mart would fill in at 1B.

Jeff Francouer (OF) & Yunel Escobar (SS) – Francouer has been benched and Escobar has been in Bobby Cox’s doghouse for the better part of the season. Kansas City is said to “covet” Escobar and have interest in Francouer as a rehab project. Atlanta is said to be interested in a Teehan for Francouer swap but not Teehan for Escobar. Expect the powers that be in KC and ATL to work things out over the All-Star Break and come up with a package that works for both teams.

Tuesday, July 7, 2009

********BLOCKBUSTER TRADE*********

"If you're not moving, you're just standing still", said SwinGERS GM Jason Gerwig this afternoon as he consumated a deal with the Baby Gorilla's that sent Kevin Youklis, Ryan Braun, and Nick Markakis to the jungle for Miguel Cabrera, Andre Ethier, and Jermaine Dye.

With the SwinGERS needing a power surge in their lineup, acquiring Cabrera, Ethier, and Dye certainly will fill that need. "That's an area we've been losing each week", proclaimed Gerwig as he exited his palatial estate in Ukranian Village, "this upgrade should add a few volts to what could be a powerful lineup in the second half".

With the Baby Gorilla's in dead last in PG East, a move had to be made to shake things up. "Unfortunately, things haven't worked out as we planned this season, and we're struggling", said Gorilla's GM Jim Clark, "when that happens you can't stay stagnant, you have to keep fighting". With an abysmal 49-74 record, the Gorilla's certainly lost some power today but did pick up batting average capability, along with a little more speed.

"I've always liked what Mr. Markakis has brought to the table, and I look forward to seeing him in a Gorilla uniform, said Jim Clark, "i'm sorry to see a fellow Sun Devil leave in Andre Ethier, he'll be missed".

3K Tuesday

With the big trade that went down 2 days ago, and team owners looking to position themselves for the stretch run, as well as 2010, is there anyone out there that will be looking to enter into the trade market or are the majority of you content with just scraping arms and bats off the scrap heap?

Now that we're pretty much at the half-way point who are your biggest surprises on your respective team, and your biggest disappointments? For instance, who is the guy that you assumed to just be the rock in your organization, you signed him to a 3-year deal and now you're trying to figure out why you're still allowing him to flounder on your bench.

I'll start: I have to say that Chien-Ming Wang has to be my biggest disappointment. I got him locked in to next season as well! I also thought Conor Jackson was going to take the next step in his career, but instead he's been hampered by the oddest illness known to man??

Come on, start some discussions before the Commish decides to shut-us down just for spite. A little housekeeping....has the commish collected monies from everyone? Anyone who hasn't sent their league entry money in should be shut down on transactions until they get their money in -- team should be frozen! It's unacceptable you deadbeats!


Monday, July 6, 2009

Recap Monday

Today's post will be representative of feedback this blog receives daily from members of this league. In the words of Pink Floyd, "Is there anybody out there"? Now if you'll excuse me, I'm gonna go hold my breath and wait for a comment.

Baby Gorillas-5
The Rockpile-5

Jimmy's Daddy-7
The SwinGERS-3

CO Yankees-3

Client #9-5
Year 2000!-3

Hoosier Heat-7
Tallcorn Cobras-2

Lawndale Longhorns-5
Clark & Addison-3

Sunday, July 5, 2009


Out of nowhere, the Tallcorn Cobras have sent Carlos Beltran and Miguel Tejada to the Cornholers for Nelson Cruz and Jimmy Rollins. This weekend trade ends a drought in the trade market, as both teams have fired the opening salvo in what could be a very active trading season.

With Gordon Beckham emerging as a fantasy threat, 3K saw his move to dump a reeling (and very unproductive) Jimmy Rollins. In the event Beckham can't cut the mustard for the Cornholers down the stretch, Miguel Tejada isn't a bad alternative. In the meantime, Tejada will take Nelson Cruz's place as utility player.

But make no mistake, 3K lost A LOT of production with the departure of Nelson Cruz (power, speed, scoring and driving in runs). Why someone would part with a potential 30-30 guy is beyond me. One might point out that Carlos Beltran is all about the 30-30 club and this is simply a tit for tat trade. Not this guy because it ain't gonna happen for Carlos this year. Also keep in mind historically, Beltran's numbers are better overall in the first half of the season as compared to the second half. Sure, Carlos dodged a bullet by not needing surgery. But anyone will tell you that a bone bruise is a tough healer and could put a hamper on his production for the rest of July and into August. This is clearly a BIG gamble for 3K, who is putting a ton of faith in Carlos Beltran's health and talent. If he returns to the lineup and produces comparably to Nelson Cruz, consider this trade a success.

At this particular point in time, the Cobras clearly don't need Jimmy Rollins (what with Derek Jeter's staggering numbers in the wind tunnel that is Yankee Stadium). I think it was a very bad move to acquire Jimmy Rollins at this juncture. If he's looking towards next year, then perhaps I can begin to understand. If Jimmy starts producing like gangbusters this season, T-Dub is gonna have to sit one of his outfielders (between Bay, Cruz, Hawpe, and Soriano) to make room for him. I'm simply not comfortable with it. I'm loving the Nelson Cruz move though. T-Dubs outfielders are looking good, with Jason Bay and Brad Hawpe providing a solid foundation. The Nelson Cruz acquisition solidifies a well rounded outfield battery (and if Lou Pinella grows a brain and drops Soriano in the lineup, watch out). Cruz will score 100 runs this season, hit at least 40 bombs, steal 25-30 bases, and drive in 130. That's a whole lotta noise coming from that ghetto blaster.

This move may help out both teams (as this clearly was the intent, there is no white flag in the vicinity). I hate the Rollins pickup, and I'm not a fan of the Beltran move. Miguel Tejada can throw up a solid batting average...but the HGH is clearly not coarsing through his veins like the days of yore. 5 stars for the Nelson Cruz pickup, T-Dub. Time will tell, fellas. What do you think?

Wednesday, July 1, 2009

Linc's Rumblings, Whispers, and Rumors

Welcome one and all to Week 2 (semana dos a mi Mexicana-Americana amigos) of what Linc has learned – the 4th of July collector’s edition. With precisely 30 long-hot days until the July 31st trade deadline Linc has smelled a lot of smoke but seen very little fire on the trade front.

Since we all have raw meat to grill, cold beer to drink, and 30 minutes to wait before we can go swimming after we eat (safety first) let us get started!

Bronson Arroyo (SP) – The Reds appear to be one of those rare buyer/seller combinations around the trade deadline and Walt Jocketty has gone on record saying he plans to be aggressive. Since arriving from Boston Arroyo has been too inconsistent to justify his $9.5 million 2009 salary, let alone the $11 million owed to him in 2010. The Mets and Giants have had mild interest but Texas appears to be the most likely destination with Hank Blalock getting shipped to the Queen City in return.

Felipe Lopez (INF) – Clearly the Cubs offense needs a spark and one rumor making the rounds has Lopez involved in his second consecutive trade deadline deal. If Lopez heads to the north side he could serve as a solid #2 hitter and provide some much needed speed near the top of the Cubs order. Couple a Lopez addition with the return of Aramis Ramirez and the baby bears might have the kick in the offensive butt needed to power their way back to the top of the NL Central.

Eric Bedard (SP) – Seattle’s desire to trade Bedard took a hit with his recent DL stint though don’t worry – it only delayed the inevitable. Bedard is a lock to be on the move with the Dodgers, Brewers, and Phillies all possible destinations. When healthy Bedard can solidify a shaky rotation and put his high K rate to good use for a team with an offense.

Mark DeRosa (INF) – DeRosa’s name has been floating around for a while now and I fully expect we will be hearing it a bit longer. The Indian’s brass claim they might hold onto him and see if the team can catch lightning in a bottle with the return of Westbrook and Sizemore. Should this comment have been made during a poker game I believe the appropriate term used to describe such a statement is BLUFF and DeRosa will have another uniform to hang on his game room wall after he retires. Both NY teams, as well as the Marlins have expressed interest. My money is on the Cardinals however. Troy Glaus’s throwing arm has fallen off – pretty much literally – and DeRosa would provide some pop at the hot corner and experience in a young dugout.

Jeff Nieman (SP) – The pitching rich Rays will have one too many starters once Kazmir returns from his rehab assignment. Price could be optioned to 3A or go to the bullpen to make room. Another option is for the Rays to trade Nieman to Texas, Colorado, Milwaukee, or the Dodgers who would covet a young experienced arm. Unfortunately, the Rays biggest need is bullpen help and none of the four teams listed above have the parts to give. That is unless the Rockies fall apart and then you might see a Hudson Street to Tampa for Nieman and a prospect or two.

Matt Holiday (OF) – Just like Kenny dying at the end every South Park episode (you bastards!) or Macgyver defusing a bomb with a paperclip, a roll of duct tape, and a tampon you can count on there being a Matt Holiday rumor. The team de jour now is the San Francisco Giants. Much like the Adam Dunn to the Bay rumor last week Holiday would provide some power to a team that ranks near the bottom of the league in every offensive category. SF can buy low and hope Holiday can channel his inner Barry while roaming left field.