Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Recap Tuesday

Nigerian Nightmares-112
Roscoe Village Hot Dogs-105

Like most contests this season, this matchup went down to the Sunday night Bears-Eagles game and like most Bears games this season, the Hot Dogs were left scratching their heads. LeSean McCoy and DeSean Jackson single handedly won this game for the Nigerian Nightmares. The Hot Dogs had the lead until the 4th quarter, and the Philly D and Hot Dog Nightmare Jay Cutler simply couldn't keep up. I knew it was you, Jay Cutler, you broke my heart.

Hoosier Heat-100
The Goat Locker-89

Steady as she goes, Mr. Hackman. Hoosier Heat continues to win at the right times and stays atop PG South. The Pats D went a long way to helping the Heat win (although the same cannot be said about Devery Henderson). As for the Goat Locker, I'm not quite sure about the Ryan Moats start. I mean, I get it, he broke off 126 yards and 3 scores a few weeks back, but in the words of Janet Jackson, what have you done for me lately? Chad Ochocinco needs to stop twittering and start concentrating on helping The Goat Locker, what a brutal slump. And after taking a look at the Goat Locker's running back corp, I'd be very concerned.

CO Giants-88
Jimmy's Daddy-76

I never thought I would see the day, but Giant Mike is leading his fantasy football division. The Daddy's missed a golden opportunity to wrap up the sub-par PG North, but the long slog continues. With two consecutive 20 point performances, Sidney Rice has cemented himself as the leader of the Giant receiver corp (and a dangerous leader at that). With running backs at a premium, Hef is going to have a hard time hanging on to this division with Justin Fargas and Pierre Thomas at the helm.

Tallcorn Cobras-91
Berwangers Brawlers-70

T-Dub with a pretty easy victory this week, with Terrell Owens COMIN OUT OF THE BOOTH!!!!!! That's two weeks of good production and only time will tell if he'll return to fantasy prominence. It has to be frustrating to decide week after week who to start, Beanie Wells or Tim Hightower? This could get him into trouble down the stretch. Hey Ger, it might be time to give Devin Hester a seat.

Chimps Gone Wild-132
The Rockpile-93

The Matt Schaub-Andre Johnson one-two punch can be flat out dangerous, as it was last night (with a combined 37 points). When you're putting up a 132 spot, it's gonna be almost impossible to win (I don't care who you are). Toss loss for the Rockpile, who can't seem to get it together this season. Although he has to be excited by Justin Forsett and Jason Snelling, who have emerged as two serious fantasy threats. If they can continue the output, don't count The Rockpile out.

Lawndale Longhorns-116
Rusty Trombones-115

How many close games can the Trombones be in? And two close losses in a row, has to hurt. This might be weird to say, but the player 3K blames for his week 11 woes is none other than Jay Cutler!! You know you're a shitty quarterback when you are causing fantasy teams that you are not on to lose. New Linc is pacing quite well, and positioning himself to make a run in PG South. All he has to do is figure out when to play or sit Roy Williams, and he'll be ok.

Monday, November 16, 2009

Monday Recap

Roscoe Village Hot Dogs-60
Rusty Trombones-57


Berwangers Brawlers-68
The Goat Locker-67

The Ger is hanging by a very thin thread here and in his words..."he's got the Ravens D, lights out". The Ger is correct, Team Locker not only has a potent Ravens D, they also have Derrick Mason going tonight. With a Trombone loss, the Goat Locker is poised to reclaim at least a share of first place in PG West. FOOTNOTE-Is the Goat Locker worried about competing down the stretch with his current receiver corps?

The Rockpile-114
Tallcorn Cobras-100

Bronco Mike already enjoying the Reggie Wayne-Thomas Jones blockbuster, as Reggie rips off 24 fantasy points this week (including the game winner). Amazing. This loss is excruciating for T-Dub, as he could have tied it all up in PG Central. My guess is Beanie Wells will be starting next week.

Jimmy's Daddy-111
Lawndale Longhorns-80

Hef continues to keep that Dalai Lama fantasy karma going with a big win over the Lawndale Longhorns. Sure, Linc has Ray Rice going tonight, but there's no way he's getting 32 points for the win. Who does he think he is, Randy Moss? The No Doz "Caught Sleeping Behind The Wheel" Award goes to New Linc this week with his Kevin Boss play. That's No Doz....wake up, turbo!!!

CO Giants-138
Nigerian Nightmares-30

Talk about two extremes, Giant Mike has the best week of his life while Old Linc has the absolute worst week of his life. The result, a 108 point differential. I must say, if the CO Giants are running on all cylinders, ain't nobody beatin em!!! RB Chris Johnson goes all Rhianna on the Buffalo D and that's all she wrote. Pretty embarrassing that Giant Mike could have sat his entire team, just played Chris Johnson....and still won. BTW, Old Linc, did you really call me a windbag on my voicemail Friday night?

Chimps Gone Wild-82
Hoosier Heat-81

I think Mr. Hackman needs a hug. First, Favre embarrasses the Packer faithful two weeks ago, rendering him permanently bitter. Now, Joseph Addai can't close last night with 20 more yards (10 for the tie). That injury in the middle of the game HAD to hurt. The silver lining, however, is that every other team in his division lost as well.

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


In a surprising Veteran's Day Move, the Roscoe Village Hot Dogs have traded star wideout Reggie Wayne to The Rockpile for running back Thomas Jones.

"This is all about shaking things up", said Hot Dogs GM PG, "what we're doing right now clearly isn't working, our running game is non-existent".

"At 2-7, I had to", declared Rockpile GM Bronco Mike, "I have the #2 rushing offense but am last in receiving, so I was in a position to make the move".

Thomas Jones has amassed 704 rushing yards with 7 touchdowns this season (with 433 of those yards coming in his last 3 games). Reggie Wayne has 753 yards receiving, finding the end zone 6 times thus far.

With the Roscoe Village Hot Dogs posting a 3-6 record and The Rockpile at 2-7, the trade is being looked at as a last ditch effort to save their respective seasons.

"It's now or never, if we don't start winning some ball games, we can kiss the playoffs goodbye", quipped PG.

Monday, November 9, 2009

Monday Recap

Note to self, if you punch someone who has a helmet on, it's not going to hurt them.

Tallcorn Cobras-79
Roscoe Village Hot Dogs-66

DeAngelo Williams and Tom Brady were the excitement in this matchup. Huge win for T-Dub as he keeps pace with Mr. Hackman and Hoosier Heat. I can't tell who is worse, the Chicago Bears or the Roscoe Village Hot Dogs. The week I decide to sit Cutler, he decides to break off 31 points. I would fire myself if I could.

Lawndale Longhorns-92
Goat Locker-74

Linc and his Longhorns are hanging in there in PG South, and this win is big. That is, if Mike Wallace doesn't decide to spoil the party tonight (which I don't see as a possibility). As long as the Longhorns have Rodgers, Jones-Drew, and Ray Rice as his core players, they're gonna be in the conversation come playoff time. And cutting his lead in his division to one game is monumental. PG South is officially up for grabs.

The Rockpile-92
Jimmy's Daddy-88

All Willie Parker needs to do is run (or receive) for 50 yards and he'll open a 2 game lead in a very weak PG North. In case that doesn't come to fruition, Hef has the Steelers D to sew this one up. The Rockpile was caught snoozing Sunday with Anquan Boldin (where were you on that one, Bronco Mike?). Disgraciad!!

Berwangers Brawlers-87
Nigerian Nightmares-78

This was a HUGE win for Ger and the Brawlers. If the Daddy's stall this evening, then it'll be a two way tie in the PG North standings. Larry Fitzgerald did not disappoint yesterday, as he answered the call (and The Ger's tweet) for a very productive day. Tough loss for the Nightmares, with every team in the division winning, they needed to be victorious.

CO Giants-109
Chimps Gone Wild-109

A photo finish? Not so fast!! Giant Mike has Brandon Marshall going this evening and is 10 yards away from victory. Could Giant Mike create a three way tie for first place of the fabled PG West (not likely, but there's an outside chance)? The Chimps lost Clinton Portis to a head injury, and that could have meant the difference in game.

Hoosier Heat-85
Rusty Trombones-70

I'm sure 3K doesn't want me to make the prediction and jinx it, but I believe he will be in the winners circle by the end of the evening. And it's Big Ben and Hines Ward who are going to take him there. This win is big, as 3K will take control of PG West and defeat a surging Hoosier Heat who are on a 7 week winning streak. Look for 3K to be gloating and talking trash for the forseeable future (God help us).

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

Top Quarterbacks-Week 8

Aaron Rodgers-Lawndale Longhorns-34 points
Brett Favre-Goat Locker-33 points (Did not start)
Tony Romo-Berwangers Brawlers-27 points
Donovan McNabb-Rusty Trombones-26 points
Matt Hasselbeck-Chimps Gone Wild-21 points
Drew Brees-Jimmy's Daddy-20 points
Joe Flacco-Roscoe Village Hot Dogs-13 points (Did not start)
Eli Manning-Jimmy's Daddy-13 points (Did not start)
Peyton Manning-Goat Locker-13 points
Philip Rivers-CO Giants-13 points
Matt Ryan-Nigerian Nightmares-11 points
Jay Cutler-Roscoe Village Hot Dogs-10 points
Jake Delhomme-Hoosier Heat-9 points
Kurt Warner-Rockpile-9 points
Matt Schaub-Chimps Gone Wild-8 points
Kyle Orton-Rusty Trombones-7 points
Marc Bulger-Tallcorn Cobras-5 points
David Gararrd-Berwangers Brawlers-3 points

Monday, November 2, 2009

Photo Finish Monday

I would have LOVED to watch yesterday's Vikings-Packers game with Mr. Hackman. We should have hired a psychiatrist to observe Mr. Hackman during the game. Talk about being conflicted. His idol is playing for the wrong team (conflict #1) so he is forced to hate him (even though it's counter to every feeling he's ever had about the guy), he is rooting (in the inner depths of his psyche) for Adrian Peterson (who is on his fantasy team) while at the same time Peterson is treating Lambeau Field like his own backyard. If Jimmy's Daddy had the Packers Defense/Special Teams, I'm afraid that would have sent Hackman straight to the looney bin.

Roscoe Village Hot Dogs-94
Goat Locker-86

God, are you there? It's me, PG. Could you do me a big favor and render Michael Turner useless for tonights game against the Saints?

CO Giants-97
Tallcorn Cobras-74

T-Dub needs 24 points and has Roddy White and a dinged up Jeremy Shockey (questionable) going tonight. To me, that's a pretty tall order. Will Giant Mike be celebrating TWO victories this evening?

Hoosier Heat-82
Jimmy's Daddy-41

Are Drew Brees and Pierre Thomas enough to make up 41 point deficit? Normally, I would say Hef is in the clear, but I'm afraid Devery Henderson and John Carney are going to carry Mr. Hackman over the finish line. Look for a nail biter here.